I’m an estate planning lawyer who urges people to be careful planners. In my own life, I’m a cobbler who wears my own shoes. I try to plan every detail and contingency in my life. On top of that, I’m extremely practical. That’s me—pretty much a boring, practical planner. (At least I’m self-aware.) I don’t do spontaneous.
So picture this scene. Last Thursday night, after a full week of travel, work, and events every evening, I was desperate for a weekend to recharge. A text arrives. It’s my New York daughter Lizzy, who just scored two Saturday tickets to “Funny Girl,” a perfect father-daughter outing. My immediate response: “I can’t do that. It’s too last minute.” Lizzy wasn’t accepting that. Her reply: “YOLO.” I figured it out—You Only Live Once. My wife Laurie added: “One day, you won’t be able to travel. Do it while you can. Also, you’d drop everything for something bad, so why not drop everything for something good?” Minutes later, I’m booking a 24-hour trip to New York.
I’m writing this post on the flight home, tired but grateful that I broke out of my practical planner mold. Last night with Lizzy was a mountaintop moment we’ll both cherish forever. The show was terrific, but more than that, we made a lifetime memory. Lizzy and I share a lot of the same wiring. The highs and lows of Fanny Brice’s journey as an entertainer resonated with both of us. We felt that joy and pain deeply, and it was even richer because we felt it together.
I had almost backed out. Lizzy discovered that the title role was being performed by an understudy. After a brief internal debate, I proceeded with the trip and figured if it’s not performed by Barbara Streisand, what’s the difference if it’s Lea Michele or someone else? Good decision. The understudy was brilliant.
The last time I did something spontaneous was 12 years ago. Leaving an event, friends invited Laurie and me to join them for five days on a yacht—leaving the very next morning! Again, the practical planner in me instantly declined. Then Laurie set me straight. I reversed my decision, and we had the best getaway ever. I’m grateful to have a wife and daughter who challenge me when my brain is yelling “this makes no sense.” Sometimes we should get out of our comfort zone and do things that make no sense to us. The reward is worth it.
At this point in my life, my top two priorities are relationships and memorable moments. Being practical almost deprived me of a chance to check both those boxes. I suppose a little spontaneity looks good on me, maybe once every dozen or so years.
I’ll close with this wisdom, which sums up my night with Lizzy (sing along with me): “People, people who need people, are the luckiest people in the world.” Indeed, I am.
Marvin E. Blum
Marvin Blum made a spontaneous trip to New York to join his daughter Lizzy Savetsky at “Funny Girl,” totally out of character but totally worth it!